Ending of winter and start of Spring in the Equator

Few daya go it was 2006 then bohhooo with the big stupid parties with drunk people rolling arnd we entered 2007. Personally I didnt go to any of these but was watching revenge of the sith on star movies.
So this is my life..it had a crappy introduction, it will have a crappy middle and hopefully a crappy ending. My parents say its cos i dont work too hard.... well how can i cheer up the situation..by enjoying the misery i am thru.
Yesterday was a "clockwork orange" day when i landed both the book adn the movie at the same time. After a feeble effort to read the book in the bus...with the language of "malchikas and viddies and rot and etc etc" I gave up.....so when i was home and had time to relax I went thru the movie...the movie with its weird background of those horror clown movies and its very very depressing and disturbing surroundings disturbed me so much that i had to watch "notting hill" to counteract the effect...
well actually notting hill and a stupid charlie sheen sitcome called "2 and half men " about some playboy blah blah blah....
wasnt feeling like waking up this morning...donno something deep inside is so depressing it saps away teh strength to start a new day.....but maybe it is all the unfinished studies and the things to complete and the blah blah things to hand in...
last few days or mnths were ok rocky rollercoasterlike with a lil bit of happiness thrown in sometimes....wat differes now is that i have become a recluse whose interaction with people have come down to zero and is even scaring the shit out of my parents.....so there i am stuck to my laptop books movies and ayers sometimes....
is it because i reduces the joggin which would pump endorphins in my head and make me feel happy.....i really understood that after growing up being happy is a really really difficult thing to acheive.......u can be succeful ...have a great time ..but when are u really happy...
my words have no direction...everything im thinking is just pouring out thru this noisy keyboard thru which im typing....atleast realized that the world has changed ..the city i was born in has changed and the people whom i knew have changed...those who need the money dont have it...those who dont have plaenty of it...
this maybe called hypocrisy cos yes i do have a 37 inch lcd tv...an apartment at the 25th storey of a really posh condo in singapore but these hardly matter to me...im full of greif cos i have grown up (not cos i havent got any taller after class 10)but its the loss of childhood and mostly "growing uop"